This I, Anonymous post sucks.

[sickbadthing]

Here (http://forums.thestranger.com/showthread.php?t=1663)

Holy Christ dude, the forum isn't called My, life story. Quit being so insecure you twat. Here's a pro tip for when you write 8 paragraphs of rambling boredom: MAKE IT INTERESTING.

[sickbadthing]

LOL. Okay. Just stay anonymous then. Do you wear your girlfriend's frilly dresses when you post? You're showing some major sack by continuing to post anonymously to answer my thread in a forum where you're expected to be logged in to reply. I bet your body-building idol Vin Diesel wouldn't act like a pansy. Come on. Just log in and defend yourself here.

[doublesmooth]

The post you linked to is gone. Was it my post about being a bouncer? If it was I apologize for the verbose nature of the post. I need an editor.

[sickbadthing]

I take back everything I said then. Please forgive me for my lack of sensitivity.

[doublesmooth]

If there is anything besides the length of the post you'd like me to defend, let me know. I don't really need a cloak of anonymity and cherish witty repartee.

[sickbadthing]

Nah. All the fun has fizzled and since Christmas is coming up, I've decided I'm going to be positive from now on. Keep working on your Bouncer Chronicles. Hey I know, could you post a story about how you beat someone within an inch of their lives? I enjoy that kind of thing.

[doublesmooth]

Never beat anyone within an inch of their lives. I did have someone attempt to jump through the plateglass windows out front of the club once because I wouldn't let them in as they were too drunk to even stand up, nevermind make it four hours on their feet. I ran out the front door and as I was following the trail of blood up the street and getting closer to the perp, I took a look at his arm and the glass had cut his arm down to the bone right by the elbow and he had a big old flap of meat hanging off, just flopping back and forth as he tried to walk up the street. I caught up to him and he informed me that "I know pain. I'm a blacksmith." and wanted to fight. I had no interest whatsoever, I just wanted to make sure the cost of that window wasn't coming out of my meager check. Meanwhile, as he's poking me in the chest, my face is contorted in a mask of utter disgust as his blood is squirting all over my shirt and arm. The cops showed up shortly thereafter.

Apparently the guy had been drinking for about 6 hours before he tried to come into the club and was taken to Harborview where the cops handcuffed him to his bed without any pain meds. All because I wouldn't let a guy who had clearly had enough have any more.