This one's sure to piss you off, but...

[Going, Going, Prague]

So as a straight man with plenty of gay friends and best friends, here's my issue. I live in Capitol Hill and I go to shows all the time. Part of why I like it here is because everybody's queer-friendly and the music scene's nice and vibrant.

But, when I went to the Electrelane show at Neumo's on Monday I could not help but marvel at all the drunken lesbian couples making out in the front rows. Now, couples making out at shows is fine. Lesbians are fine. Electrelane, a godspeed-esque all-girl british quartet, were amazing live. So what's the problem? How come the first time I see these legions of hipster lesbian couples is at this show? It's not like the band's Bikini Kill--most of the songs are instrumental. My friend and I debated this for a day or so; I think it comes down to that music is way too image-based. Would all the lesbians have stayed home is the band as all men, or conversely, all straight women (I don't know the band member's orientations, nor do I care. Would you care is Sigur Ros were all gay or straight?)

People out there, enlighten me. I'm not sure if this is born out of ignorance or just frustration with Seattle segregation (as in, how come I never see these girls at other Neumo's shows? I certainly have seen plenty of male couples and straight couples there...).

[poochiekafelnikov]

Lesbians, particularly celebratory difrancofiles, can be a fickle lot...displaying or not displaying ficklish tendencies...I've given up trying to figure out their motives and actions...sapphic code crackery is not in my male pattern makeup...I now attractively enjoy them as a tribe who's customs and behaviors are inexplicably nobler than that of which I know...the slender agile short-haired variety are especially winning...winning

[meherenowie]

poochie come home

[smallpoxchampion]

I don't know about gay women, but gay men are some of the biggest mainstream whores that I know. If Out Magazine touted lathering yourself with Miracle Whip and sliding around on Saran Wrap as being THE gay activity of the Year, you'd see gay men running into bars with $10 cover charges hoping to roll around in some fake mayonaise. All you would need is some no-talent hack like P1Nk! or whatever the fuck her name is, to make a music video about it and you'd be lucky to be straight and ever see a bottle of Miracle Whip in your life again.

I mean how is it possible for a group based on sexual preference to be composed of people that all have the EXACT SAME taste in music? Every time I hang out with gay men I am appalled at the music that goes into the stereo. How is it possible for a whole room full of gay men to be into Madonna and Rihanna and NOTHING else?

A recent homo tried to explain to me that it all had to do with the fact that gay men like to dance at clubs and whatever plays at clubs is what they bring home. I get the whole let's dance like 15 year old girls thing, but why the fuck does it all have to be to shit music? You want to fucking dance? You can just as easily dance to LCD Soundsystem, HEALTH, MGMT or even fucking Fatboy Slim so don't give me that. It's a fad science and that's all there is to it. It's just a pity that somewhere along the line, some fucking homo couldn't have stood up and stuck a few DFA 1979 CD's into some sperm-lathered stereo in some gay bar somewhere in the US.

I am so glad that I grew up far far away from mainstream gay culture. Bring on Melt-Banana over the Pet Shop Boys any day of the week.

Fuck mindless consumerism, fuck mainstream gay culture and fuck Madonna.

[meherenowie]

I don't know about gay women, but gay men are some of the biggest mainstream whores that I know. If Out Magazine touted lathering yourself with Miracle Whip and sliding around on Saran Wrap as being THE gay activity of the Year, you'd see gay men running into bars with $10 cover charges hoping to roll around in some fake mayonaise. All you would need is some no-talent hack like P1Nk! or whatever the fuck her name is, to make a music video about it and you'd be lucky to be straight and ever see a bottle of Miracle Whip in your life again.

I mean how is it possible for a group based on sexual preference to be composed of people that all have the EXACT SAME taste in music? Every time I hang out with gay men I am appalled at the music that goes into the stereo. How is it possible for a whole room full of gay men to be into Madonna and Rihanna and NOTHING else?

A recent homo tried to explain to me that it all had to do with the fact that gay men like to dance at clubs and whatever plays at clubs is what they bring home. I get the whole let's dance like 15 year old girls thing, but why the fuck does it all have to be to shit music? You want to fucking dance? You can just as easily dance to LCD Soundsystem, HEALTH, MGMT or even fucking Fatboy Slim so don't give me that. It's a fad science and that's all there is to it. It's just a pity that somewhere along the line, some fucking homo couldn't have stood up and stuck a few DFA 1979 CD's into some sperm-lathered stereo in some gay bar somewhere in the US.

I am so glad that I grew up far far away from mainstream gay culture. Bring on Melt-Banana over the Pet Shop Boys any day of the week.

Fuck mindless consumerism, fuck mainstream gay culture and fuck Madonna.HeheheeheeheeheeheeheeHeeHeeheeheeheeheehe ehee.

Damn, why am I not hung over?

[skidmark]

A recent homo tried to explain to me that it all had to do with the fact that gay men like to dance at clubs and whatever plays at clubs is what they bring home.

I don't know why the gays would be any more exempt from the temptation of appealing to a low common denominator in the pursuit of getting some than the straights.

[smallpoxchampion]

I don't know why the gays would be any more exempt from the temptation of appealing to a low common denominator in the pursuit of getting some than the straights.


So you're saying that homos spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars on crappy music to get laid?

I can understand people spending money on clothes, hair, beauty products to get laid - those are superficial, objective items that have no reflection on an individual's personalities.

Music, on the other hand, is subjective and very indicative of personality. If one is going to spend money on shitty music just to get laid, why not spend money on shitty food, shitty religions, shitty books and shitty movies... JUST TO GET LAID?

What really bothers me is the branded nature of homo consumerism with regards to music. They'll ooh and aah and giggle and flap their hands at the latest song by "The Ting Tings" (note to self: add new post to blog entry "Worst Band Names of All Time"), yet if you were to play them another band, a less popular one, that sounds EXACTLY like "The Ting Tings" (ok I can't say that band name anymore), they would stand around, scratch their heads, looking confused and scared. You would have to show them a picture of Rihanna high fiving said less popular band before they would sigh, wipe their brows and finally enjoy the music.

Fuck homo consumerism, fuck TTT and fuck homo-dance-music. There is way better music out there to dance to than the shit that they play at most gay clubs and bars. It's about time gay men just admitted that the only reason they've successfully conned themselves into enjoying this music is that they feel it is a part of their "gay identity".

There is only one part to one's "gay identity". Sucking cock and fucking man ass. Everything else is media-induced bullshit.

[skidmark]

So you're saying that homos spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars on crappy music to get laid?

Yes, I suppose that is a reasonable inference.

[smallpoxchampion]

I'm gay. I don't listen to mainstream "gay" music. I get laid.

[skidmark]

That's awesome.

[Abulafia]

I'm gay. I don't listen to mainstream "gay" music. I get laid.

Nah, I don't think you're gay. I just think you're a straight asshole who likes to fuck himself.

[smallpoxchampion]

Nah, I don't think you're gay. I just think you're a straight asshole who likes to fuck himself.

Thank you for sharing that profound insight with us all.

Now why don't you go wear something glittery and dance to an Enrique Islesias song while I suck some cock to Battles.

[Abulafia]

Thank you for sharing that profound insight with us all.

No, sweetheart. That was just for you.

Now why don't you go wear something glittery and dance to an Enrique Islesias song while I suck some cock to Battles.

Jesus. Who the fuck is Enrique Islesias? I am so not going to go Google this shit. Fucking children.

Sucking cock to Battles. That's totally cute.

You are about, eh, 21.

Maybe.

[smallpoxchampion]

No, sweetheart. That was just for you.

That's what Private Messages are for, pookiebum.


Jesus. Who the fuck is Enrique Islesias? I am so not going to go Google this shit. Fucking children.

Sucking cock to Battles. That's totally cute.

You are about, eh, 21.

Maybe.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enrique_Iglesias

I guess I misspelled his last name. Oh, the guilt!

Wrong about my age. Jesus, shouldn't a mature, respectable organism like yourself stray from random assumptions and bizarre generalizations. I thought that shit was for


Fucking children.


I have no beef with you Abulafia.

But pssst... your pinkie's pointing up again!

[Abulafia]

That's what Private Messages are for, pookiebum.

No. That's actually what I use when I want to give a fuck.

And when someone says shit about homosexuals and at the same time professes to be one, I don't.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enrique_Iglesias

I guess I misspelled his last name. Oh, the guilt!

Yeah. Still never heard of the guy.

Wrong about my age. Jesus, shouldn't a mature, respectable organism like yourself stray from random assumptions and bizarre generalizations. I thought that shit was for

"mature respectable organism?" Seriously?

The assumption wasn't random—indeed, it was neither an assumption, nor was it random. And it certainly wasn't a generalization.

See, what I said was,

"I just think you're a straight asshole who likes to fuck himself."

That was a deduction based on your idiocy.

A generalization would sound more like,

"It's about time gay men just admitted that the only reason they've successfully conned themselves into enjoying this music is that they feel it is a part of their "gay identity.""

But pssst... your pinkie's pointing up again!

Guess what I'm aiming for?

[smallpoxchampion]

Pookiebum, if you want to say something to me and only me, there are other ways to do it. When you post something in a forum, you are stating it to everyone who is a member of that forum, and then some.

There is nothing in our DNA that makes us like a certain type of music based on sexual preference. Hence, it stands to follow that if there is a type of music that is labeled as "gay music", the only reason it is deemed as such is as a result of media/social stereotyping.

Stop being such a fascist little homo that you cannot allow me my own opinion. I think that most gay people like shitty dance music because they think "that's what you're supposed to like when you're gay."

I give straight people shit all the time for engaging in stereotypical behavior because they think "we're supposed to". I'm not going to lay off homos just because I am one.

Because then I would be a bitch.

Just like you.

[smallpoxchampion]

"I just think you're a straight asshole who likes to fuck himself."

Is not a deduction based on anything. It's you coughing up a tampon and crying the same old bigot-wolf that every homo cries when anyone dares say anything critical about gay culture. Grow the fuck up. Gay people are evolving beyond dance clubs and Eurythmics CDs. Get used to it.

[Abulafia]

Pookiebum, if you want to say something to me and only me, there are other ways to do it. When you post something in a forum, you are stating it to everyone who is a member of that forum, and then some.

Wow. This isn't your first rodeo, is it?

There is nothing in our DNA that makes us like a certain type of music based on sexual preference. Hence, it stands to follow that if there is a type of music that is labeled as "gay music", the only reason it is deemed as such is as a result of media/social stereotyping.

This has absolutely nothing to do with anything you've written previously.

Nor does it make any sense.

I also have no idea what you mean by "gay music," but I may know more gay people than you do.

Stop being such a fascist little homo that you cannot allow me my own opinion.

First, I have never tried to deprive you the idea of your own opinion (nor, indeed, of anyone else's opinion); I just can't figure out what it is.

Second, I can't help being a fascist little homo. It's in my DNA.

I think that most gay people like shitty dance music because they think "that's what you're supposed to like when you're gay."

This is why I figured you were in your early 20s. If you aren't, shame on you.

I give straight people shit all the time for engaging in stereotypical behavior because they think "they're supposed to". I'm not going to lay off homos just because I am one.

Ecce: homo.

Ergo: elk.

[smallpoxchampion]

Wow. This isn't your first rodeo, is it?



What?



This has absolutely nothing to do with anything you've written previously.

Nor does it make any sense.


What? Are you ok?


I also have no idea what you mean by "gay music," but I may know more gay people than you do.


Haha. You've got to be kidding me. He wants to play "Who's the Bigger Scene Queen" now. I know 43.6 gay people approx. And U? LOL call me grrrl xoxoxoxo.

By gay music, I mean, but am not limiting myself to:

The Ting Tings
Rihanna
P1nK! (or whatever the fuck her name is)
Madonna
Pet Shop Boys
That stupid chick that sings that "I kissed a girl and I liked it!" song.

Among many others. Seriously, are you ok?



First, I have never tried to deprive you the idea of your own opinion (nor, indeed, of anyone else's opinion); I just can't figure out what it is.


My opinion is that the music of mainstream gay culture sucks. Along with presumptuous, officious, condescending, illogical, hysterical homosexuals like yourself.


Second, I can't help being a fascist little homo. It's in my DNA.


Not even funny. Doesn't even make sense. Fascism isn't hereditary you imbecile. Scratch that. It is funny. It's fucking hilarious.



This is why I figured you were in your early 20s. If you aren't, shame on you.



Wrong. My age has nothing to do with this. Either way, shame on you for being a douchebag who listens to shitty music because he thinks that what you're "supposed to do" when you're gay.


Ecce: homo.

Ergo: elk.

Yeah. Awesome.

[Shattered Roses]

Hey, this is pretty much the same conversation Freikja had with Abs a little while ago. Trust me, SPC, you get used to passing derogatory remarks from her. It's part of the atmosphere here, plus it makes you angry at her, which makes the sex so much better.

[smallpoxchampion]

Alfalfa is a woman?

I got all turned on for nothing!

[meherenowie]

You didn't mention whether you'd take it in the ass, SPC.

Abs will ram you to the lungs if she feels like it. Welcome!

[smallpoxchampion]

Depends on who's serving.

And only after the second date.

Well... not always...

[meherenowie]

Depends on who's serving.

And only after the second date.

Well... not always...

Don't burn out on us too fast, cutie. Read some old threads if you really want a taste.

[Shattered Roses]

My opinion is that the music of mainstream gay culture sucks. Along with presumptuous, officious, condescending, illogical, hysterical homosexuals like yourself.

I busted out laughed when I read this. He's talking about Abulafia. Abulafia, for Christ's sake! Ahahaha!

[Duncan]

What really bothers me is the branded nature of homo consumerism with regards to music. They'll ooh and aah and giggle and flap their hands at the latest song by "The Ting Tings" (note to self: add new post to blog entry "Worst Band Names of All Time"), yet if you were to play them another band, a less popular one, that sounds EXACTLY like "The Ting Tings" (ok I can't say that band name anymore), they would stand around, scratch their heads, looking confused and scared. You would have to show them a picture of Rihanna high fiving said less popular band before they would sigh, wipe their brows and finally enjoy the music.

Fuck homo consumerism, fuck TTT and fuck homo-dance-music. There is way better music out there to dance to than the shit that they play at most gay clubs and bars. It's about time gay men just admitted that the only reason they've successfully conned themselves into enjoying this music is that they feel it is a part of their "gay identity".

There is only one part to one's "gay identity". Sucking cock and fucking man ass. Everything else is media-induced bullshit.

Maybe they do enjoy it? Some people probably do like that sort of music.

Or maybe they're doing it because they're just young and trying to fit in? I think most of us went to clubs / parties / festivals we didn't really want to go to because our friends were going and we didn't want to be left out.

Or maybe it is all about identity. There are good reasons why groups construct some sort of 'collective identity'. This is especially true when it's a group that's been subjected to persecution.

It seems like a lot of people do the stereotypical gay club / very camp thing in their late teens / early twenties and then move away from it. That probably coincides with coming out, something that can be very difficult. It certainly coincides with discovering who you are and where you fit in the world. Having a sense of belonging to the 'gay identity' may well make this process easier for some people. If it does then I can't see any reason why we should sneer at them for it. If they want to be part of this for their entire life then I can't see any reason to sneer at them. I've never wanted to do it, but others participating doesn't affect my life.

You seem to take it as a personal insult that people listen to "homo music"* or whatever. I'm really confused by this. If you don't like it, don't do it, but why judge those who do?

*As a sidebar, I'm very uncomfortable with the way some parts of the gay community are 'reclaiming' the term homo.

[smallpoxchampion]

Insomnia sucks. Three nights in a row. Go figure.

Maybe they do enjoy it? Some people probably do like that sort of music.


I'm not doubting that "some people" do. But why do "most gay people"? I don't see straight people inclined towards a certain genre of music, so why has this predilection towards dance music become such a staple to the gay diet?



Or maybe they're doing it because they're just young and trying to fit in? I think most of us went to clubs / parties / festivals we didn't really want to go to because our friends were going and we didn't want to be left out.


Exactly my point. But not because they're young. But to "fit in". Well, fuck that.


Or maybe it is all about identity. There are good reasons why groups construct some sort of 'collective identity'. This is especially true when it's a group that's been subjected to persecution.


That's what saddens me. The same group that was once described by artists like Oscar Wilde, Allen Ginsberg and the Velvet Underground is now painted by "I kissed a girl and I liked it!"


It seems like a lot of people do the stereotypical gay club / very camp thing in their late teens / early twenties and then move away from it. That probably coincides with coming out, something that can be very difficult. It certainly coincides with discovering who you are and where you fit in the world. Having a sense of belonging to the 'gay identity' may well make this process easier for some people. If it does then I can't see any reason why we should sneer at them for it. If they want to be part of this for their entire life then I can't see any reason to sneer at them. I've never wanted to do it, but others participating doesn't affect my life.


I have no problems with people going out to clubs. If you still want to go out and dance at gay bars in your dentures with your Depends hanging out of your Gap Senior Citizen jeans, then all the more power to you. I love going to out to clubs, just like I love Disney movies. I just don't want to come home and spend all my free time coloring in pictures in my Snow White coloring book.


You seem to take it as a personal insult that people listen to "homo music"* or whatever. I'm really confused by this. If you don't like it, don't do it, but why judge those who do?


I suppose it is coming across that way, for which I apologize. I'm just wondering at how a lot of my fellow homo brethren came to identify themselves with such shit music.


*As a sidebar, I'm very uncomfortable with the way some parts of the gay community are 'reclaiming' the term homo.

As in, you just don't like it when it's used in a fashion that offends your sensibilities, right? But if someone were to paint the words "I am a HOMO" on a giant pink penis and float it down Main Ave on a Sunday afternoon, then you'd want to print T-shirts and hand out condoms to people walking by.

Just to clarify the situation though:

All of you are basically telling me that you think that a lot of gay people listen to this shit "just to fit in". You're validating my initial post, so I really don't see what the argument is about. I know homo feelings got homo hurt, but all I was saying was that I wish mainstream gay culture embraced a more diverse taste in music.

[meherenowie]

When someone says shit about __________ and at the same time professes to be oneis perhaps the safest way to do it.

Bitching about the tips at Grossinger's was once a startlingly unattractive and callow gamekeeper habit -- but one loudly forgiven at the Edenwald Center.

[Duncan]

I'm not doubting that "some people" do. But why do "most gay people"? I don't see straight people inclined towards a certain genre of music, so why has this predilection towards dance music become such a staple to the gay diet?

I don't know that it has. You may be right, but it's not something that I've noticed. Maybe we mix in different circles.


Exactly my point. But not because they're young. But to "fit in". Well, fuck that.

We all try and fit in, or at least almost all. Most of us conform to certain recognised norms in life. Most of us end up in communities (family / club / whatever). Most of us end up doing things that we don't really want to do because we recognise that it's a part of being a member of the community, i.e. we do it to fit in. If people feel that they gain something from being part of whatever subsection of the gay community we're talking about, and listening to that sort of music is the price to pay, why the hell shouldn't they? That is if they feel it's an appropriate price.


That's what saddens me. The same group that was once described by artists like Oscar Wilde, Allen Ginsberg and the Velvet Underground is now painted by "I kissed a girl and I liked it!"

It's not an either or thing. The fact that a subsection of the gay community behaves in a certain way does not preclude others from behaving differently.

Frankly, I wouldn't want to be described by someone who wrote mildly amusing drawing room comedy.

Anyway, if you're right and the only thing that unites us is sex then why would it be desirable, or even possible, for an artist to describe us.


I suppose it is coming across that way, for which I apologize. I'm just wondering at how a lot of my fellow homo brethren came to identify themselves with such shit music.

Peoples' capacity to make choices that, to you, seem inexplicable is a fact of life. It keeps things interesting. I'm frequently surprised that anyone over the age of 14 would read, let alone adore, Harry Potter. Still, a great number of people do. Whatever keeps them happy.


As in, you just don't like it when it's used in a fashion that offends your sensibilities, right? But if someone were to paint the words "I am a HOMO" on a giant pink penis and float it down Main Ave on a Sunday afternoon, then you'd want to print T-shirts and hand out condoms to people walking by.

Erm, no I wouldn't. Read what I wrote, that's the only way to know what I think. I said that I'm uncomfortable about the word homo being 'reclaimed'. That means I'm uncomfortable with its use in anything other than a pejorative way. Obviously I don't think people should aim to be offensive, so I basically don't like the word being used.

I would not wear it on a t-shirt. Nor would I in my wildest dreams waste time handing out condoms. Nor would I go to some sort of pride march.

All of you are basically telling me that you think that a lot of gay people listen to this shit "just to fit in". You're validating my initial post, so I really don't see what the argument is about. I know homo feelings got homo hurt, but all I was saying was that I wish mainstream gay culture embraced a more diverse taste in music.

I have no idea what you mean by the bit I put in bold.

My argument had two strands. First, we all seek some sense of belonging. Maybe this is one way people do it. Fine, it's a lot less destructive than many. Secondly, and more importantly, why do you care?

[Abulafia]

I busted out laughed when I read this. He's talking about Abulafia. Abulafia, for Christ's sake! Ahahaha!

Yeah. I'm used to people here thinking I'm a dude. It's obviously 'cause of my mustache, and in spite of the clearly feminine Latin ending of "dictatrix." And my awesome bosoms.

But a gay dude? That's totally new.

Awesome.

[Abulafia]

is perhaps the safest way to do it.

Bitching about the tips at Grossinger's was once a startlingly unattractive and callow gamekeeper habit -- but one loudly forgiven at the Edenwald Center.

Different kinds of bitching, MHN. Let a doctor bitch about the medical profession, sure: but when I hear a... an Asian bitching about "mainstream asian culture" and how asians are—oh, hell. I don't know. sloppy eaters. Bad tuba players. Whatever. Unflattering and incorrect stereotypes—when I hear an asian bitching about such not to engage in any sort of cultural commentary but rather to point out that she or he possesses a much more refined aesthetic sense, it's bullshit. It's self-aggrandizing bullshit.

[dongdaemun]

I admit I once thought Abs was a gay man. Maybe its because she comes across as intelligent, has some extravagant tastes and a flamboyant writing style?

[Abulafia]

Maybe we mix in different circles.

Duncan, I'd say this is a pretty safe bet.

Most of us end up doing things that we don't really want to do

Like socializing with people. Ever.

It's not an either or thing. The fact that a subsection of the gay community behaves in a certain way does not preclude others from behaving differently.

I have a sense that spch is overestimating as a majority a very small subsection of "the gay community," and because of the reference to dance music—and now the sorts of artists he's mentioned—I suspect it is a youngish and less educated subsection. When I see individuals overestimate as a majority a very small subsection—and as you might guess, I see this more often than I'd like—it is usually the case that the individual identifies in some way with certain characteristics of the subsection—young, perhaps, and not terribly well educated just yet—and thus sees this subset as "mainstream."

On another topic, I've never quite understood the phrase "the gay community." I've had gay people in my life since I was a child; I've never been able to identify one community; indeed, the idea that there is a "gay community" that can be identified as "the" gay community strikes me as insulting and simplistic.

I mean, seriously. Am I part of "the female community?" (answer: no) In spite of spch's suspicion that I am a gay man, I'm pretty much female. So that makes me female. It does not make me part of a—much less "the"—female community. There isn't one. I have a very little in common with a lot of women, a moderate amount in common with others, in various ways, and enough in common with maybe two or three to want to ever spend time with them socially. Only an idiot would ever suggest that there is something that should be recognized as "the female community"; I can't figure out why people think there should be a "gay" one.

Anyway, if you're right and the only thing that unites us is sex then why would it be desirable, or even possible, for an artist to describe us.

This is similarly why I don't get the idea that there should be one identifiable community "of the gays." This either suggests much more in common than sexual orientation or suggests that sexual orientation is not one aspect of your personhood, but the only one that matters.

I'm frequently surprised that anyone over the age of 14 would read, let alone adore, Harry Potter. Still, a great number of people do. Whatever keeps them happy.

Just as long as I don't have to read about it.

Ahem.

My argument had two strands. First, we all seek some sense of belonging. Maybe this is one way people do it. Fine, it's a lot less destructive than many. Secondly, and more importantly, why do you care?

Rotten music played at clubs one need not attend does not really seem a gripe compelling enough to warrant spch's rant. Not sure spch really cares. Think spch wishes to self aggrandize. This is probably why I fell asleep reading his posts last night.

Had dreams of two-headed action figures.

[Abulafia]

I admit I once thought Abs was a gay man.

But that was only after you met me in the flesh. Admit it.

Maybe its because she comes across as intelligent, has some extravagant tastes and a flamboyant writing style?

I'm totally going to pretend that you didn't just say that you thought I was a man because I am intelligent.

But I'm only going to pretend this because of your pretty, pretty eyelashes and breathtaking sixpack. C'mere, you.

I do have extravagant tastes, however. Especially for vodka. Remember that.

[meherenowie]

It's self-aggrandizing bullshit.True dat; many rants are. He might be more edible with a little tenderization.

[Abulafia]

Abs will ram you to the lungs if she feels like it. Welcome!

Abs has been making a concerted effort not to be such a destroyer lately.

Let's not egg her on.

[meherenowie]

Abs has been making a concerted effort not to be such a destroyer lately.

Let's not egg her on.Don't be a scrote, Kittycat.

[dongdaemun]

But that was only after you met me in the flesh. Admit it.



[QUOTE]I'm totally going to pretend that you didn't just say that you thought I was a man because I am intelligent.

A gay man actually. I also thought Melle was a woman for months.

[Duncan]

On another topic, I've never quite understood the phrase "the gay community." I've had gay people in my life since I was a child; I've never been able to identify one community; indeed, the idea that there is a "gay community" that can be identified as "the" gay community strikes me as insulting and simplistic.

Yep, I'm in agreement. I guess I used the phrase as lazy shorthand. Shorthand for what I'm not quite sure. I guess the whole subsection sentence only worked within the context some larger group. Odd. It's not a phrase I would normally have chosen and I'm trying to work out why I did. Unfortunately I have the memory of a fruit fly and can't remember what was in my mind when I was writing the previous post.

[Abulafia]

Haha. You've got to be kidding me. He wants to play "Who's the Bigger Scene Queen" now. I know 43.6 gay people approx. And U? LOL call me grrrl xoxoxoxo.

I'm not being mean. But I'm going to quote every point at which spch referred to me as a gay man, because it makes me giggle.

Yeah. I don't know how many gay people I know. It's certainly a hell of a lot more than 43.6; then again, the government won't let me use the bear tags anymore, so they are harder to keep track of.

And, alas, I'm far from a scene queen. Friends do call me princess, however.

By gay music, I mean, but am not limiting myself to:

The Ting Tings
Rihanna
P1nK! (or whatever the fuck her name is)
Madonna
Pet Shop Boys
That stupid chick that sings that "I kissed a girl and I liked it!" song.

I once saw a picture of Rihanna on a transatlantic flight when I was reading one of those tabloidy sorts of things. Tabloids and endless scotches are about the only things that get me from here to LHR with sanity intact. Added bonus is that I get a couple of hours to catch up on what people call "the pop culture." Indeed, I travel not to travel, but rather to figure out if Jen is still cross with Brad. Or, whatever.

Ok, so I've seen a photo of Rihanna. Can't remember why, don't care. Don't know her music.

Have heard of Pink. Don't know the music.

Ok. Madonna. Of course I've heard of her. My eight year old niece likes her a lot. She's a talented businessperson (my niece), but I wish she'd cut it with the kabala (Madonna). I don't really know her music these days (still Madonna), but it's never particularly struck me as gay.

Pet Shop Boys. Yes. I remember them from preschool. That's right. I was in preschool when they came out. I swear this to you. I cannot remember a single song of theirs, but I recall they were cloying and saccharine.

Oh. Ting Things. Yes. I have no idea what you are talking about.

See, if you had first listed these "bands" and then asked what I knew of them, you may not have come to the conclusion that I am a young gay man with no musical taste.

Seriously, are you ok?

Well, I woke up feeling not so male. Or gay. Maybe it'll pass?

Oh, Jesus. Who put these breasts here?!?

My opinion is that the music of mainstream gay culture sucks. Along with presumptuous, officious, condescending, illogical, hysterical homosexuals like yourself.

Are you saying I suck?

Fascism isn't hereditary you imbecile.

I like that you actually took the time to point that out.

Either way, shame on you for being a douchebag who listens to shitty music because he thinks that what you're "supposed to do" when you're gay.

Jesus Christ. And a vagina. Great. I am sooooo going to be kicked out of the gay community.

[meherenowie]

I was afraid you'd gotten so ravenous lately you'd forgotten to play with your food. Better.

[smallpoxchampion]

Haha. I love this.

Alfalfa, you FINALLY figured out that I thought you were a gay man? Are you fucking serious? Maybe if you weren't so busy fondling yourself to your own posts, you would have figured it out a LONG time ago. I've been referring to you as a gay man since your first post. In fact, my first post started with "I don't know about GAY WOMEN, but GAY MEN..."

If I were to use logic like yours, you're not a gay man, what crawled up your deserted asshole?

Some cunts assume other people are in their early 20's, some cunts think a fascist lesbian is a gay man. Oh excuse me, "deduce" was your word of choice, I believe.

I'm not overestimating anything, except maybe for Duncan and Alfalfa's powers of denial. The "gay scene" (if you are going to sit there and scratch your heads and go "I don't know what this means" then you have serious problems), has come to be defined by shitty dance music. Just because you don't listen to it doesn't automatically make it "self-aggrandizing bullshit".

At least it's possible to have a semi-decent conversation with Duncan. Alfalfa on the other hand... she started out the whole discussion by calling me an "asshole" who was pretending to be gay and now she's spraying ovaries everywhere because I thought she was a gay man.

In the end though, fanatics will be fanatics. They cannot fathom a world in which people have opinions that differ to theirs. They want to live in denial, pass off every opposing thought as a "rant" and "bullshit", bolstered by the support of the three other fanatics they know at an Internet forum. Apparently Alfalfa doesn't know who Rihanna is, Aflalfa is gay... hence no gay people listen to Rihanna.

Brilliant!

[Duncan]

I'm not overestimating anything, except maybe for Duncan and Alfalfa's powers of denial. The "gay scene" (if you are going to sit there and scratch your heads and go "I don't know what this means" then you have serious problems), has come to be defined by shitty dance music. Just because you don't listen to it doesn't automatically make it "self-aggrandizing bullshit".

I think that Abs and I are of the same mind. This may be your experience of the 'gay scene'. This is certainly not mine (ours?). I'm not 100% sure what the gay scene is.

I still come back to the this; if gay is just who you sleep with then how can we have a scene? I'm assuming you're gay, as am I. We seem to have fuck all in common. Judging by your posts I sure wouldn't want to spend time with you. You probably wouldn't want to spend time with me. So, I'm guessing, we don't share a 'scene'.

Once more, why do you care about this so much? We're all different. If people choose to go out every night dancing to music you disapprove of then fine. They should go for it.

[smallpoxchampion]

It just seems funny to me that when I base my opinions on my experiences, it's "bullshit". When you base your opinions on your experiences, it's wisdom, knowledge and fact.

Dear God Duncan, why are we chasing our own tails again. This isn't about "dancing". I was just stating that I find it ridiculous that being gay has come to be typified by shitty music. You can disagree with me based on your own experiences, but stop skirting the issue and stop discrediting my opinions based on my age and the number of gay people that I know.

Of course we share a scene, Duncan. Unless you're an Internet homo, a.k.a. "discreet", if you want to get laid, you best get your ass into a club/party/other gay people's homes. Stop being such a hippie and romanticizing the term "scene".

I wouldn't mind spending time with you. I'm not a fanatic. But your response doesn't surprise me. Most fanatics would rather kill opposing factions than learn to get along with them.

Heil Homosexualia!

[Duncan]

It just seems funny to me that when I base my opinions on my experiences, it's "bullshit". When you base your opinions on your experiences, it's wisdom, knowledge and fact.

If you bother to read my posts you'll see that I didn't say that you're wrong, I said that you seemed strangely strident and that what you were saying wasn't my experience.

Of course we share a scene, Duncan. Unless you're an Internet homo, a.k.a. "discreet", if you want to get laid, you best get your ass into a club/party/other gay people's homes. Stop being such a hippie and romanticizing the term "scene".

I'm inclined to believe that we don't share the same 'scene'. Apart from anything, people I know show some courtesy. You continue to address me as "homo" despite me saying that I find the term objectionable. If you had bothered to get into a discussion about why that would be one thing. However, you just continue to throw the term at me despite me saying that I find it offensive. That suggests to me that we come from very different places.

Heil Homosexualia!

Now, for no good reason, you throw a Nazi reference in. Why? Is your sole purpose to offend?

[smallpoxchampion]

Less whining, more bitching.

Please.

[Abulafia]

Alfalfa, you FINALLY figured out that I thought you were a gay man? Are you fucking serious?

Very very rarely serious, spch. Very very very rarely. Almost never with people like you.

Maybe if you weren't so busy fondling yourself to your own posts, you would have figured it out a LONG time ago. I've been referring to you as a gay man since your first post. In fact, my first post started with "I don't know about GAY WOMEN, but GAY MEN..."

No. I believe your first post to me went something like this:

Thank you for sharing that profound insight with us all.

Now why don't you go wear something glittery and dance to an Enrique Islesias song while I suck some cock to Battles.

I assumed you thought I was a girl. Who likes to wear glittery things. 'Cause, you know. I am. And I do. You haven't seen my sparkle, but it's something to behold.

If I were to use logic like yours, you're not a gay man, what crawled up your deserted asshole?

Yeah. Let's not get into a logic battle. I don't have time to arm you sufficiently.

Some cunts assume other people are in their early 20's, some cunts think a fascist lesbian is a gay man. Oh excuse me, "deduce" was your word of choice, I believe.

Searched this thread. Found that word only in your post. Oh, wait. I used "deduction." True that. Yes, I deduced that you are an asshole. True that.

You may think I would find the word "cunt" offensive. You would be wrong.

Do like that now that you've figured out I'm not the sort of gay you hate, you have decided I'm a cunt. Very clever of you. Spend much time alone?

I'm not overestimating anything, except maybe for Duncan and Alfalfa's powers of denial. The "gay scene" (if you are going to sit there and scratch your heads and go "I don't know what this means" then you have serious problems), has come to be defined by shitty dance music. Just because you don't listen to it doesn't automatically make it "self-aggrandizing bullshit".

You clearly know nothing of Marine Biology or houseboys. 'Nuff said.

At least it's possible to have a semi-decent conversation with Duncan. Alfalfa on the other hand... she started out the whole discussion by calling me an "asshole" who was pretending to be gay and now she's spraying ovaries everywhere because I thought she was a gay man.

Dude, I got like four ovaries. You take off my shoe, you see ovaries growing out of my foot.

I got, like, 30 ovaries. Each one with a small explosive charge. You cut one off, I grow seven more in their place. I got ovaries that explode into pitbulls that shoot bees out of their mouths.

You think I'm angry that you thought I was a gay guy? You embarrassed?

Don't fall at my feet and die, dude. That's been so done.

Everyone here thinks I'm a man at first. Well, most people. It's neither a compliment nor an insult. I don't quite understand it, but there it is. My best friends have always been guys, and that's probably because I grow a nice mustache and can drink them under the table. Also, I look like a man.

A man-atee, that is!

In the end though, fanatics will be fanatics. They cannot fathom a world in which people have opinions that differ to theirs.

Opinions usually differ from opinions, rather than to them. But whatever. What's a coupl'a prepositions between friends?

Hah! Get it? Between? Another preposition!!

You can't fathom my world, sweetheart. And that's totally cool. We don't need to be able to fathom each other's worlds (though I suspect yours would measure well less than a fathom) for me to point out you are a self-aggrandizing wanker.

They want to live in denial, pass off every opposing thought as a "rant" and "bullshit", bolstered by the support of the three other fanatics they know at an Internet forum. Apparently Alfalfa doesn't know who Rihanna is, Aflalfa is gay... hence no gay people listen to Rihanna.

Let's talk about that logic thing again, sometime.

[Abulafia]

Now, for no good reason, you throw a Nazi reference in. Why? Is your sole purpose to offend?

Nah. I think he's just trying to impress us with his ignorance.

I'm impressed. You?

[smallpoxchampion]

Very very rarely serious, spch. Very very very rarely. Almost never with people like you.


Brilliant!



No. I believe your first post to me went something like this:


My first post to you? This isn't your blog, Alfalfa. My first post, period, talked about how I didn't know if this rule applied to gay women. You're a gay woman. Once again, what crawled up your asshole?



I assumed you thought I was a girl. Who likes to wear glittery things. 'Cause, you know. I am. And I do. You haven't seen my sparkle, but it's something to behold.


It seems you have a lot of problems with assumptions. And your ego.



Yeah. Let's not get into a logic battle. I don't have time to arm you sufficiently.


But what about your sparkle?



Searched this thread. Found that word only in your post. Oh, wait. I used "deduction." True that. Yes, I deduced that you are an asshole. True that.


I haven't really deduced anything about you since I'm not a flag-waving, foaming-at-the-mouth fascist like you. All I know is that you have a very high opinion of yourself that you cannot stand anyone else not sharing.


You may think I would find the word "cunt" offensive. You would be wrong.


Of course not. Not a nice liberal little cutie lesbian like you. You'd be a lot more comfortable making passive aggressive comments like:



Do like that now that you've figured out I'm not the sort of gay you hate, you have decided I'm a cunt. Very clever of you. Spend much time alone?


If you noticed, Alfalfa, I call both of us cunts. But that's not something I expect a rabid egomaniac like you to consider. No, it's much much easier to label me a sexist homophobe. You're such a cliche, it's turned boring.



You clearly know nothing of Marine Biology or houseboys. 'Nuff said.


See, I have to get the joke being thrown at me for it to be funny. It's not really funny if the only people laughing are you and your five other online buddies.



Dude, I got like four ovaries. You take off my shoe, you see ovaries growing out of my foot.

I got, like, 30 ovaries. Each one with a small explosive charge. You cut one off, I grow seven more in their place. I got ovaries that explode into pitbulls that shoot bees out of their mouths.


That's fascinating. Another progressive who spends more time in bickering over the inconsequential.


You think I'm angry that you thought I was a gay guy? You embarrassed?


Yes, I'm embarrassed. Especially since you were the one that noticed that I thought you were a guy.


Don't fall at my feet and die, dude. That's been so done.


Hahaha. Dude, I'm gay. Calm down.


Everyone here thinks I'm a man at first. Well, most people. It's neither a compliment nor an insult. I don't quite understand it, but there it is. My best friends have always been guys, and that's probably because I grow a nice mustache and can drink them under the table. Also, I look like a man.


I didn't ask for your autobiography, babe. Not interested.


You can't fathom my world, sweetheart. And that's totally cool. We don't need to be able to fathom each other's worlds (though I suspect yours would measure well less than a fathom) for me to point out you are a self-aggrandizing wanker.


Once again, not interested in your world or in putting it down. I wanted Duncan to understand that we can have differing opinions and still get along.


Let's talk about that logic thing again, sometime.

You spend an AWFUL lot of time talking about yourself, how you look, how you think and act. What makes you think I give a shit whether you look like a walrus or an otter?

[Abulafia]

If you bother to read my posts you'll see that I didn't say that you're wrong, I said that you seemed strangely strident and that what you were saying wasn't my experience.

Nor did I say he was wrong. As a gay man, I merely pointed out that I object to his representation of all us gay men listening to dance music.

That is all.

As a gay man, I hardly ever listen to dance music. It's mainly chamber music. And musicals. I can't get enough of those.

I'm inclined to believe that we don't share the same 'scene'. Apart from anything, people I know show some courtesy. You continue to address me as "homo" despite me saying that I find the term objectionable.

Yeah, but D: when he found out I was a woman (or, maybe a gay man doing a really good job at passing), he started calling me a 'cunt.' What do you expect? This fellow would not, I wager, know the difference between a gastropod and a cephalopod. You know what I mean.

That suggests to me that we come from very different places.

And are doubtless headed different places, as well.

[smallpoxchampion]

Awww... someone didn't like being called a cunt.

It's perfectly ok to call a man an asshole, a wanker, a dick, a prick, etc. etc. etc.

But call a woman a cunt and I'm supposed to walk around town in stocks, being lashed for every step.

Typical sexist shit. Like I said, you're such a cliche Alfalfa, you're boring.

[Abulafia]

Brilliant!

Thanks. That was my first BA.

My first post to you? This isn't your blog, Alfalfa. My first post, period, talked about how I didn't know if this rule applied to gay women.

First, it's nobody's blog.

Second, your first response to me went like this:

I've been referring to you as a gay man since your first post.

No. Untrue.

You're a gay woman. Once again, what crawled up your asshole?

Hmm. Not a gay woman.

It seems you have a lot of problems with assumptions. And your ego.

Listen, spch. I'm a woman. My subtitle ("dictatrix") is grammatically feminine. I assumed, therefore, that you recognized this and thought I was a woman. It's not a problem with my assumptions. It's a problem with your basic knowledge of latinate English grammatical endings.

You have heard, I suspect, of a "dominatrix?" The "-trix" ending is a feminine one. I put it there for a purpose. See, "dictator" is masculine; "dictratrix" is feminine. I thought this was relatively obvious.

I don't have any problems with my ego. But he thanks you for inquiring.

But what about your sparkle?

Still sparkly. Can't help it.

I haven't really deduced anything about you since I'm not a flag-waving, foaming-at-the-mouth fascist like you. All I know is that you have a very high opinion of yourself that you cannot stand anyone else not sharing.

A flag-waving, foaming at the mouth fascist?

Is that seriously all you have? Do you have, like, one slur for everyone you meat?

I have almost no opinion of myself. What little I have is not terribly high. I leave others to their opinions, and if I respect them enough, I listen.

Of course not. Not a nice liberal little cutie lesbian like you. You'd be a lot more comfortable making passive aggressive comments like:

Ok. First: cute? Yes. Liberal? Yes. Lesbian? No.

But I can hardly be a liberal and also a fascist flag-waver.

I think maybe you need to review a few of your terms.

If you noticed, Alfalfa, I call both of us cunts. But that's not something I expect a rabid egomaniac like you to consider. No, it's much much easier to label me a sexist homophobe. You're such a cliche, it's turned boring.

Yeah, didn't notice.

It's so cute that you think I'm a rabid egomaniac.

I don't think I ever labeled you a sexist homophobe. I think maybe I only said you were simple and naive. If I didn't, consider it done.

See, I have to get the joke being thrown at me for it to be funny. It's not really funny if the only people laughing are you and your five other online buddies.

It's funny to us.

That's fascinating. Another progressive who spends more time in bickering over the inconsequential.

Dude. My 120 pitbull-bee-shooting ovaries may be inconsequential to you. But they are not to me.

Plus. They are making you awfully squirmy, so they can't be that inconsequential. Can they?

Yes, I'm embarrassed. Especially since you were the one that noticed that I thought you were a guy.

No. I think that was SR.

Once again, not interested in your world or in putting it down. I wanted Duncan to understand that we can have differing opinions and still get along.

That's so sweet.

You spend an AWFUL lot of time talking about yourself, how you look, how you think and act. What makes you think I give a shit whether you look like a walrus or an otter?

This is what is called "taking the piss."

You are funny.

[Abulafia]

Awww... someone didn't like being called a cunt.

No. I think what I said is that I don't care if you call me a cunt.

It's not clever; it's not new. I don't care.

Your complete lack of humor is telling.

Jesus. This is not the time of year for me to have to deal with yet more halfwit, semiliterate idiocy. Seriously.

ETA: (or rather, edited to delete): The last bit was gratuitous. It doesn't matter. Never mind.

[meherenowie]

Now why don't you go wear something glittery and dance to an Enrique Islesias song while I suck some cock to Battles.It's pretty clear that splortch thought we were all great big fags with crapulous taste in music at first. The sad part of all this is that A) he comes close to passing the literacy requirement and B) DFA 1979 is demonstrably light-years better than Madonna. This is not an opinion, this is a fact.


This:That's fascinating. Another progressive who spends more time in bickering over the inconsequential.

Is simply not an interesting response to this:
Dude, I got like four ovaries. You take off my shoe, you see ovaries growing out of my foot.

I got, like, 30 ovaries. Each one with a small explosive charge. You cut one off, I grow seven more in their place. I got ovaries that explode into pitbulls that shoot bees out of their mouths.

It seems you have a lot of problems with assumptions.You've made far more and you're still doing it with every sentence. Demonstrate some wit.

Awww... someone didn't like being called a cunt.

It's perfectly ok to call a man an asshole, a wanker, a dick, a prick, etc. etc. etc.

But call a woman a cunt and I'm supposed to walk around town in stocks, being lashed for every step.What the hell are you on about?



ETA: (or rather, edited to delete): The last bit was gratuitous. It doesn't matter. Never mind.Curious about this myself. More than me, I'll wager.

[Shattered Roses]

It's pretty clear that splortch thought we were all great big fags with crapulous taste in music at first.

Clearly. After all, I have the gayest handle here.

Although, SPC, I don't discriminate gay music from straight music. I discriminate between bad music and good music. "Walking on Sunshine" is a really gay song, but I like it because it's a good song. I'm not gay, I'm a musician.

The only "gay scene" I can decipher within music is possibly with Fiona Apple, Regina Spektor, and Fiest. Loads of queers love those bitches. I like the latter two, Fiona Apple can shut the fuck up and suck my penis.

[smallpoxchampion]

Thanks. That was my first BA.

Fantastic.


First, it's nobody's blog.


So put your ego back in the cabinet next to the tampons. There is no "post to you" or "post to me". My FIRST post here, not to you, not to your mom, not to the dolphins that swim off the coast of Sri Lanka, basically stated that I didn't know how true this rule was for gay women, but that I had found

in MY experience (once again, not yours, not your Mom's or those cute dolphins')

that gay men were being programmed to like shitty music. I didn't bash gay men, I didn't bash Mr. Miyagi and I didn't try to kill polar bears. You and your crew of Bigot Busters then came in and called me a naive asshole and liar, for no other reason than the fact that I stated an opinion you didn't agree with. That's not deduction, that's douchebaggery.


Listen, spch. I'm a woman. My subtitle ("dictatrix") is grammatically feminine. I assumed, therefore, that you recognized this and thought I was a woman. It's not a problem with my assumptions. It's a problem with your basic knowledge of latinate English grammatical endings.


Alfalfa, I take forum handles and forum titles about as seriously as I take... well... you.

Me thinking you were a gay man, a gay woman, a frog or diharrea sliding down a brick wall had nothing to do with insulting you or trying to sodomize you. If I'm Nigerian and I give a critical speech on the nature of Nigerian politics, I hardly expect a rabid dog from Japan to come barking into the commons, getting on my case about my opinions.


I don't have any problems with my ego. But he thanks you for inquiring.


Oh no, of course not. You just fell out of Buddha's asshole last night.


A flag-waving, foaming at the mouth fascist?


Yup. This might be a mudslinging competition to you. I'm just calling them as I see them.


I have almost no opinion of myself. What little I have is not terribly high. I leave others to their opinions, and if I respect them enough, I listen.


Thank you for that, Gandhi. Your "no opinion of yourself" has come across very clear in all of your posts.


Ok. First: cute? Yes. Liberal? Yes. Lesbian? No.

But I can hardly be a liberal and also a fascist flag-waver.

I think maybe you need to review a few of your terms.


I think Pookiebum needs to look up the "word" sarcasm.


I don't think I ever labeled you a sexist homophobe. I think maybe I only said you were simple and naive. If I didn't, consider it done.


Woah! OMG! LOL! SO creative! ROFL! Awesum! xoxoxoxoxo.



It's funny to us.


"It's funny to us!" Alfalfa said, pushing the new boy in school, unaware of the fact that he simply did not give a shit.


Dude. My 120 pitbull-bee-shooting ovaries may be inconsequential to you. But they are not to me.

Plus. They are making you awfully squirmy, so they can't be that inconsequential. Can they?


Once again, GAY. NOT interested.


You are funny


Hey... wait a minute!


Your complete lack of humor is telling.


So which one is it, Alfalfa?

You called me an asshole. I called you a cunt. Stop whining about it. You're about as creative and groundbreaking as I am. Get the fuck over it.


Jesus. This is not the time of year for me to have to deal with yet more halfwit, semiliterate idiocy. Seriously.


Oh, Jesus. Stop getting all emo on me now. I love these Internet trolls that can't handle a little feedback. Guess what honey, if you don't want to have to deal with me then log the fuck out, turn off your computer, go into the other room and read a book. No one's forcing you to be here so stop whining about it.

[smallpoxchampion]

It's pretty clear that splortch thought we were all great big fags with crapulous taste in music at first. The sad part of all this is that A) he comes close to passing the literacy requirement and B) DFA 1979 is demonstrably light-years better than Madonna. This is not an opinion, this is a fact.


Hey there Henchman#4, I love your powers of ESP that led you to determine what I thought about the people at this forum. I'm really scared.

Plz dun hurt me! I love my grammar LOL.


Is simply not an interesting response to this:


Thank you Siskel & Ebert. I am eagerly awaiting your critique of each and every line that I have written. But I'm really scared.

Plz dun hurt me! I love my grammar LOL.


You've made far more and you're still doing it with every sentence.


I know. All I do is make assumptions.

So, Patricia Arquette, maybe you also know what I was wearing when I wrote these posts. What about my height? Any clairvoyant feelings about what I thought Duncan likes to eat for breakfast when I made these posts? Oooh oooh oooh and what about my feelings on lentils. Surely you know about my feelings on lentils!


Demonstrate some wit.


Oh no! Siskel & Ebert gave me

Two
Thumbs
Down!

What ever will I do!


What the hell are you on about?


I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike.

Seriously though, I get it. You want to show your support for Alfalfa/disdain for my opinions. But don't make an ass out of yourself to support the cause.


Curious about this myself. More than me, I'll wager.

OMG! SO witty LOL. U R good. Wish I wuz lke u. LOLOLOLOL. xoxoxoxo.

[Shattered Roses]

Oh shit. Did Matt come out of the closet and invent a new handle?

Or did someone let a troll in here?

[meherenowie]

You want to show your support for Alfalfa/disdain for my opinions.Actually I was sticking up for you. It went away now.


Meh.

[smallpoxchampion]

Clearly. After all, I have the gayest handle here.

Although, SPC, I don't discriminate gay music from straight music. I discriminate between bad music and good music. "Walking on Sunshine" is a really gay song, but I like it because it's a good song. I'm not gay, I'm a musician.



Why is it so unacceptable for me to state that in MY opinion, bad music is being attached to mainstream gay culture (i.e. the image of gays as it exists in the media and within gay men's minds and not Alfalfa's best friend in high school, Duncan's boyfriend or Chuck Palahniuk's neighbor). I'm giving you an opinion based on (drum roll...) MY experiences (TADA! WEIRD!). If you follow Alfalfa's reasoning then we all need to find the oldest person on the planet and do whatever he/she says we should do. And everyone else is a

self-aggrandizing
naive
asshole.

What bollocks!


The only "gay scene" I can decipher within music is possibly with Fiona Apple, Regina Spektor, and Fiest. Loads of queers love those bitches. I like the latter two, Fiona Apple can shut the fuck up and suck my penis.

It's funny you should mention trolling.

It's perfectly ok for you to make a generalization based on your experience, i.e. "loads of queers love those bitches". I don't see anyone snarling and snapping at you for your credentials. And I guess that makes me a troll.

Once again, brilliant!

[dongdaemun]

Is SPC really Rhode Islander?

[Shattered Roses]

Why is it so unacceptable for me to state that in MY opinion, bad music is being attached to mainstream gay culture (i.e. the image of gays as it exists in the media and within gay men's minds and not Alfalfa's best friend in high school, Duncan's boyfriend or Chuck Palahniuk's neighbor). I'm giving you an opinion based on (drum roll...) MY experiences (TADA! WEIRD!). If you follow Alfalfa's reasoning then we all need to find the oldest person on the planet and do whatever he/she says we should do.

It isn't unacceptable. We just think you're wrong.

[dongdaemun]

I do have extravagant tastes, however. Especially for vodka. Remember that.


Do you like soju? it tastes like vodka and has 30% more gasoline.

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y123/kurrant7/soju.jpg

[meherenowie]

Now why don't you go wear something glittery and dance to an Enrique Islesias song while I suck some cock to Battles.
It's pretty clear that splortch thought we were all great big fags with crapulous taste in music at first. The sad part of all this is that A) he comes close to passing the literacy requirement and B) DFA 1979 is demonstrably light-years better than Madonna. This is not an opinion, this is a fact.


Hey there Henchman#4, I love your powers of ESP that led you to determine what I thought about the people at this forum. I'm really scared.So it was directed to someone in particular, hm?


Is SPC really Rhode Islander?Not bright enough.

[Abulafia]

It isn't unacceptable. We just think you're wrong.

Listen, guys. He just got here. He's encountered something he didn't expect. He's spinning off a bit. Either he'll stay, or he'll go.

We can't do anything for it at this point, nor do I care either way.

[Shattered Roses]

Listen, guys. He just got here. He's encountered something he didn't expect. He's spinning off a bit. Either he'll stay, or he'll go.

He'll stay. He likes it too much to leave. Plus, he's the most interesting person on here right now... and the only person who's generating any kind of material worth responding to.

Edit:

Ooh! Post 666. How devilishly appropriate it comes as a response to Abs!

[Abulafia]

He'll stay. He likes it too much to leave. Plus, he's the most interesting person on here right now... and the only person who's generating any kind of material worth responding to.

I find melle's ghost far more interesting: any day. Any day, any night.

This guy bores me. If this is all we have now, I'm booking a ticket to the Maldives and running away with Duncan. Or, hell, I'll just catch a bus up to the Old Mitchell place. Better stuff up there. Scotch and stuff. Guinness, even.

Seriously. He's sorta boring. Has shown no sense of humor, and he's had, like, two days. The rest of us have made ample fun of ourselves, and dude hasn't been able to pick up on it and play along. He's taking himself too freaking seriously. Bleh. It's boring. It shows a lack of imagination, and a lack of intelligence. Maybe it's not what he expected, but his inability to get with the program is lame.

I'm not asking him to go. I don't care. I'd never ask him to go. But I don't find idiocy interesting. I'll respond to annoyances, if provoked, but it's too easy. It's dull. Bleh.

Ooh! Post 666. How devilishly appropriate it comes as a response to Abs!

Yeah. 'Cause I'm totally the devil.

You wish.

[Shattered Roses]

Yeah. 'Cause I'm totally the devil.

You wish.


Another edit:

My post 666 came as #66 in this thread and had 69 words in it.

Proof that Abs is one sexy devil.

[smallpoxchampion]

I find melle's ghost far more interesting: any day. Any day, any night.

This guy bores me. If this is all we have now, I'm booking a ticket to the Maldives and running away with Duncan. Or, hell, I'll just catch a bus up to the Old Mitchell place. Better stuff up there. Scotch and stuff. Guinness, even.

Seriously. He's sorta boring. Has shown no sense of humor, and he's had, like, two days. The rest of us have made ample fun of ourselves, and dude hasn't been able to pick up on it and play along. He's taking himself too freaking seriously. Bleh. It's boring. It shows a lack of imagination, and a lack of intelligence. Maybe it's not what he expected, but his inability to get with the program is lame.

I'm not asking him to go. I don't care. I'd never ask him to go. But I don't find idiocy interesting. I'll respond to annoyances, if provoked, but it's too easy. It's dull. Bleh.



Yeah. 'Cause I'm totally the devil.

You wish.

Why aren't you in the other room, reading your book?

Of course I'll stay. I love the narcissism in this place.

[smallpoxchampion]

I miss Norman Bates in Mother-mode Alfalfa.

Brad Pitt from Interview with the Vampire-mode Alfalfa's a buzzkill.

[Abulafia]

Why aren't you in the other room, reading your book?

As a matter of fact, I am.

[smallpoxchampion]

YAY! I'm going to go read too.

[Duncan]

Nah. I think he's just trying to impress us with his ignorance.

I'm impressed. You?

I'm always impressed when people use a word with a strong Nazi connotation. I can't work out why people do it, but I assume it's just that they have, at best, a minimal knowledge of history.

[Duncan]

Why is it so unacceptable for me to state that in MY opinion, bad music is being attached to mainstream gay culture (i.e. the image of gays as it exists in the media and within gay men's minds and not Alfalfa's best friend in high school, Duncan's boyfriend or Chuck Palahniuk's neighbor). I'm giving you an opinion based on (drum roll...) MY experiences (TADA! WEIRD!).

You're more than welcome to give your opinion, that's all I was doing. I'm not quite clear on what mainstream gay culture is, or why you find it quite so objectionable. I was taking issue with the rather nasty sneering tone that you used.

You bring up how gays are portrayed in the media. That's something that has, in the past, made me a bit uncomfortable. It seemed like they were focusing on choices that only some make - multiple partners, open relationships, kind of a narcissistic lifestyle etc. - and then trumpeting them as the gay norm. I don't notice this so often now. I'm not sure if it's because things have changed or just that I read different things.

[Abulafia]

I'm always impressed when people use a word with a strong Nazi connotation. I can't work out why people do it, but I assume it's just that they have, at best, a minimal knowledge of history.

Doubtless you've seen this?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/blog/2008/dec/17/adolf-hitler-birthday-new-jersey

I really have no further comments.

[Duncan]

Doubtless you've seen this?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/blog/2008/dec/17/adolf-hitler-birthday-new-jersey


Hadn't actually. "People need to move forwards". Yuk.


I really have no further comments.

It's vile.

[Shattered Roses]

Doubtless you've seen this?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/blog/2008/dec/17/adolf-hitler-birthday-new-jersey

I really have no further comments.

I burst out laughing when I read that. It reminds me of when my mother was an inner-city maternity nurse dealing with all the very strange names.

There was Mr. and Mrs. Davidson, who named their boy Harley.

There were twins: Lemonjello and Orangejello (Pronounced Le-mon'-jel-lo and Or-an'-jel-lo, fortunately I suppose)

There were twins Bonnie and Clyde

There was the woman who named her child after the first thing she saw when she gave birth. She was in an ambulance. The baby boy was named Sunoco.

There was the new immigrant from India who named her boy Ashit. (Once it was explained to her the meaning in English, however, she promptly changed it.)

And then my favorite: A woman wanted to name her boy Glorious. My mother and the rest of the nurses felt so bad for the boy and explained to the mother that the kid was going to get his ass kicked in high school. The woman relented and changed the boy's name to Prince, but as a compromise kept the middle name as Glorious. So, now there's some kid around high school age who's name is legally Prince Glorious.

[smallpoxchampion]

Put down my intelligence as much as you want. Standard playground fight tactic. Next it will be my mother, my penis size and other such profound statements. Word.

If I were to apply my nasty, sneering tone towards a topic you all agree with then I wonder how many of you would have a problem with me.

Alfalfa, you are, by far, the whiniest, most passive aggressive and delusional little troll I have ever met on the Internet. About the only people I can think of who are more embarrassing than you are those two morons that named their child Adolf Hitler.

My favorite part of their statement is how they tried to bring Obama into the whole thing.

"The new President has said that it is a time for change."

That one's got even Bush going "Idiots!"

Go ahead Alfalfa, now post something about Bush and link the two of us together. I DON'T WANT YOU SEEING THAT GIRL NORMAN, SHE'S A WHORE! Mother, no!

[smallpoxchampion]

I used to go to college with a kid who called himself Two-Mass. I finally saw his ID one day. It said "Thomas". Being the observant little foreign person that I am, I said "Hey, your name's not Two-Mass, it's Thomas".

The speed and faux-ruthlessness with which he pounced on me made Alfalfa look like a Pomeranian!

[skidmark]

There was Mr. and Mrs. Davidson, who named their boy Harley.

I have a female family member by the name of Harley. The only odd thing about that is some of their names seem to come Akira.

[Monkeyfist]

There once was a man from Nantucket...

[Abulafia]

Next it will be my mother, my penis size

spch, I'd never say anything derogatory about your mother's penis. Seriously. I've seen it. A thing of glory.

Rivals her mustache.

Alfalfa, you are, by far, the whiniest, most passive aggressive

Actually, I like my aggression the old-fashioned, active way.

those two morons that named their child Adolf Hitler.

This from the person who wrote "Heil Homosexualia?"

Seriously?

Go ahead Alfalfa, now post something about Bush and link the two of us together.

I can't really think of anything, other than that neither of you like homos?

[dongdaemun]

Polish vodka is good.

[Abulafia]

There once was a man from Nantucket...

Who holiday'd oft out in Phuket
His mom's mighty schlong:
O'er half a stade long;
Her 'stache: she eschewed e'er to pluck it.

[carnivorous chicken]

"Ploo-ket?"

[Monkeyfist]

Who holiday'd oft out in Phuket
His mom's mighty schlong:
O'er half a stade long;
Her 'stache: she eschewed e'er to pluck it.

If I weren't spoken for I'd be wrapped in Manatee wonder right now!

You can't coach that people!!!!

[Abulafia]

"Ploo-ket?"

Well, you have to say the whole thing with an Irish accent that veers occasionally, puzzlingly, toward the Scottish.

[meherenowie]

Well, you have to say the whole thing with an Irish accent that veers occasionally, puzzlingly, toward the Scottish.Hey, it works!

Bonus: the word "schlong" is even more fun to say.

[Gazelam]

Goddamnit, this thread almost killed my buzz. Fuck you guyz. This is just highschool clique bullshit. Un-Bearable. I guess it's more of that shitty french wine and another grindhjouse flick for me.

Smallpox had me for a minute, until he mentioned Battles. They are part of the reason I quit the record store. Goddamnit.

Goddamnit.

[Abulafia]

Goddamnit, this thread almost killed my buzz. Fuck you guyz. This is just highschool clique bullshit.

Actually, Gaz, if you'd paid much attention you'd note that at least since yesterday morning most of us were just trying to be goofy and hope spch would let it go.

[Ballard Pimp]

There was the woman who named her child after the first thing she saw when she gave birth. She was in an ambulance. The baby boy was named Sunoco.



"And why do you ask me this, Two Dogs Fucking?"

[carnivorous chicken]

Well, you have to say the whole thing with an Irish accent that veers occasionally, puzzlingly, toward the Scottish.

Yep, works.

[smallpoxchampion]

This from the person who wrote "Heil Homosexualia?"
Seriously?


That was in reference to your fascist way of looking at things, you dolt. Your "deductions" which are nothing more than hackneyed retorts from someone who finds it easier to dumb down the opposition rather than argue what they have to say.


I can't really think of anything, other than that neither of you like homos?

Ummm... Psst... I'm gay too. I know you simply cannot fathom that, but breathe deeply in and out and I'm sure that given time, therapy and medication you will. Or you won't. Who cares, anyway. Only would someone like you assume that it's impossible to still like someone if they listen to music you abhor.

As for the rest of your post... YAWN. Try harder, little one. You're so cliched, you're wholesale.

[Shattered Roses]

. Only would someone like you assume that it's impossible to still like someone if they listen to music you abhor.

It is very much impossible for me to like someone who listens to music I abhor, but that's simply because I'm a musician. If you listen to Paramore, I can't like you. If you own Paramore merchandise, I probably hate you.

[Gazelam]

Actually, Gaz, if you'd paid much attention you'd note that at least since yesterday morning most of us were just trying to be goofy and hope spch would let it go.
problem was I read the last page first and then went on to the first two.

[meherenowie]

. Only would someone like you assume that it's impossible to still like someone if they listen to music you abhor.
It is very much impossible for me to like someone who listens to music I abhorOk, I find myself in agreement with SR on this point. At least, I find it difficult to overlook a truly heinous zest for urped-up corporate pap to the point where I could adore somebody so impaired.

We do judge people by their tastes to a degree, but it's a complicated formula and relative to other factors, which is less fun to express than a rant at first. Gaz and I perked up our ears a bit; his went down for Battles, mine for lack of sparkle. It's little to do with intelligence, it's just dull.

If SPC can love more than the schloongs of Madonna / Rihanna fans, nobody minds, but I'm betting it's not likely. Buttering all homos with some "mainstream" epithet garners few rosy parsnips here, however.

[Abulafia]

It is very much impossible for me to like someone who listens to music I abhor, but that's simply because I'm a musician. If you listen to Paramore, I can't like you. If you own Paramore merchandise, I probably hate you.

See, I don't really care what music a person likes. If we like the same sorts of music, we can share music and such. If we don't, then I may politely sit through the Adams (both Bryan and Ryan), but they don't get to choose the music on long road trips.

Then again, I have no musical taste whatever.

[smallpoxchampion]

I find myself in agreement with SR on this point. At least, I find it difficult to overlook a truly heinous zest for urped-up corporate pap to the point where I could adore somebody so impaired.


Music is indicative of personality, however I have never really actively disliked a person based on their musical tastes. Regardless of what you and your clairvoyance may deem about my personality.

If SPC can love more than the schloongs of Madonna / Rihanna fans, nobody minds, but I'm betting it's not likely.

You never did tell me what you figured out about my diet and the color and consistency of my stool. And I'm a little alarmed that a lot of you will probably and seriously tell me what you have surmised.

Buttering all homos with some "mainstream" epithet garners few rosy parsnips here, however.

And buttering anyone a little bewildered at the persona of the gay male in the mainstream market with cries of bigot, idiot and Michael Jackson tribute artist garners more than the standard N00bie response from me, which is what you and your cronies desire. It's nothing to do with intelligence, it's just dull.

[smallpoxchampion]

Actually, Gaz, if you'd paid much attention you'd note that at least since yesterday morning most of us were just trying to be goofy and hope spch would let it go.


Incoming message:

Hi, this is [CENSORED], calling you for the fifth time in a row to tell you that I don't want to talk to you anymore! I don't know why you won't pick up, I don't know what the hell is wrong with you but I want you to LEAVE ME ALONE!

Confucius say letting go start with shutting your own fatass mouth first!

[Shattered Roses]

See, I don't really care what music a person likes. If we like the same sorts of music, we can share music and such. If we don't, then I may politely sit through the Adams (both Bryan and Ryan), but they don't get to choose the music on long road trips.

Then again, I have no musical taste whatever.

Think of it this way:

You have a passion for something. Something you are truly an expert on. I'm going to hypothetically say that you are an expert on degrees, especially the particularly useless ones. Now, you've met someone who also claims to enjoy degrees. After a short conversation with them, it turns out they have a PhD in Usefullness. They claim that their degree is just as good as yours, but, you being the expert on useless degrees, you understand how awful his degree is. You cast judgment on him and never speak to the man again.

This is how it is with me and music.

[Abulafia]

You have a passion for something. Something you are truly an expert on. I'm going to hypothetically say that you are an expert on degrees, especially the particularly useless ones. Now, you've met someone who also claims to enjoy degrees. After a short conversation with them, it turns out they have a PhD in Usefullness. They claim that their degree is just as good as yours, but, you being the expert on useless degrees, you understand how awful his degree is. You cast judgment on him and never speak to the man again.

Yeah, except that I wouldn't do this. I may well choose not to discuss degrees with this person (why do you assume it's a man?), and let that be that. If the person were otherwise interesting, funny, and smart, I wouldn't really care about her or his degree or opinion of mine. We just wouldn't talk degrees. As I don't really care to talk degrees unless absolutely required to do so—and I almost never am—I don't need to have this as a contact point with friends or acquaintances.

SR, if I required my friends to know as much about my specialty, or respect it, as I do, I wouldn't have friends. Maybe one or two.

I have friends with whom I do not discuss my specialty (these are most of my friends); I have friends with whom I do not discuss music; others, movies; others, books. Of these three latter topics, only books are a real passion. And yet, I have friends with whom I share absolutely no taste in books. They may tend to be less than interesting to me, but if they are otherwise fine and interesting and good people, I solve the problem by not discussing books with them.

[Gazelam]

Then again, I have no musical taste whatever.
If memory serves, you like Rembetika and old-school Hip-Hop. That's Ghetto taste.

[melle's ghost]

They may tend to be less than interesting to me, but if they are otherwise fine and interesting and good people, I solve the problem by not discussing books with them.

Ah ... so this is why we haven't discussed my prized collection of signed Beverly Cleary novels! Damn you.

[Abulafia]

If memory serves, you like Rembetika and old-school Hip-Hop. That's Ghetto taste.

Actually, 'ghetto' taste would be klezmer.

[Abulafia]

Ah ... so this is why we haven't discussed my prized collection of signed Beverly Cleary novels! Damn you.

Ah, right. So. How's the weather out there, mg? Seen any good movies lately?

[Shattered Roses]

Actually, 'ghetto' taste would be klezmer.

My father, on occasion, plays in a klezmer band. I would have to agree.

[Abulafia]

My father, on occasion, plays in a klezmer band. I would have to agree.

I like me some kelzmer now and then. Hanukkah starts tomorrow, so like it or not I'm going to have to put some klezmer on. If you don't play klezmer on Hanukkah, they take away your Elders of Zion decoder ring, and I've grown fond of it.